American Couples Have Gone To

To A Southerner It Is Faux Pas, Not Sins, That Matter In This World.

Real Feminism Is Spinsterhood. It's Time America Admitted That Old Maids Give All Women A Good Name.

The American Way Of Stress Is Comparable To Freud's 'beloved Symptom', His Name For The Cherished Neurosis That A Patient Cultivates Like The Rarest Of Orchids And Does Not Want To Be Cured Of. Stress Makes Americans Feel Busy, Important, And In Demand, And Simultaneously Deprived, Ignored, And Victimized. Stress Makes Them Feel Interesting And Complex Instead Of Boring And Simple, And Carries An Assumption Of Sensitivity Not Unlike The Old World Assumption That Aristocrats Were High-strung. In Short, Stress Has Become A Status Symbol.

Now The Only Thing I Miss About Sex Is The Cigarette Afterward. Next To The First One In The Morning, It's The Best One Of All. It Tasted So Good That Even If I Had Been Frigid I Would Have Pretended Otherwise Just To Be Able To Smoke It.

Thank God I'm Over The Hill. The Only Heat I Have Left Comes From Hot Flashes, My Promiscuity Is Confined To The Words "one Size Fits All," And I Buy My White Cotton Unmentionables At Boadicea's Retreat, Not Victoria's Secret. None Of The Things Men Do To Women Could Possibly Happen To Me Now Unless The U.s. Is Invaded By One Of Those New Russian Republics Whose Soldiers Aren't Fussy.