A Chef Who Doesn't Wash

Why Is Mcdonalds Still Counting? How Insecure Is This Company? 40 Million, 80 Billion Million Jillion Killion Tillion... Who Cares? Is Anyone Really Impressed By That Any More? Ooh, 89 Billion Sold? All Right, I'll Have One! I'm Satisfied! I'd Like To Tell The Ceo Of Mcdonalds, "look. We All Get It, Okay? You've Sold A Lot Of Hamburgers. Whatever The Number Is, Just Put Up A Sign, 'mcdonalds: We're Doing Very Well.' We Are Tired Of Hearing About Every Goddamn One Of Them."

People Don't Just Bump Into Each Other And Have Sex. This Isn't Cinemax.

Actually, The Only Memory I Have Of Being A Cub Scout Was Trying To Get My Hat Back. That Was All I Did. Run Back And Forth At My Bus Stop Going "quit It."

If People Would Only Look To The Cookie, All Our Problems Would Be Solved.

I Can Walk Through A Hotel Lobby And Watch People At The Desk And See What They're Doing. People Don't Look At Me. They Don't Even Know I'm There.