You Know Me. Any Excuse

I Ask People Why They Have Deer Heads On Their Walls. They Always Say Because It's Such A Beautiful Animal. There You Go. I Think My Mother Is Attractive, But I Have Photographs Of Her.

If There Weren't Blacks, Jews And Gays, There Would No Oscars. Or Anyone Named Oscar, If You Think About That.

We All Feel Like Idiots At One Time Or Another. Even If We Feel We're Cool 98 Percent Of The Time, That 2-percent Doofus Is Poised To Take Over Our Bodies Without Any Warning.

In The Beginning There Was Nothing. God Said, 'let There Be Light!' And There Was Light. There Was Still Nothing, But You Could See It A Whole Lot Better.

Beauty Is Not Between A Size 0 And A Size 8. It's Not A Number At All.