I Want To Thank My

North Korea Threatened To Attack If Sony Pictures Released The Interview, Forcing Us All To Pretend That We Wanted To See It.

The First Time I Went To See A Second City Show, I Was In Awe Of Everything. I Just Wanted To Touch The Same Stage That Gilda Radner Had Walked On. It Was Sacred Ground.

You Know Who Does Have A Funny Bone In Her Body? Your Mom Every Night For A Dollar.

The Thing That Always Fascinated Me About Improv Is That It's Basically A Happy Accident That You Think You're Initiating.

When Choosing Sexual Partners, Remember: Talent Is Not Sexually Transmittable.